Friday, September 12, 2008

Senator McCain Reveals Plans for Health Care Package

Today Senator John McCain unveiled his plan for a health care package in front of a crowd of supporters at a rally in Podunk, MO.  According to McCain, the plan would cover all Americans and would be implemented immediately upon him taking office if he were to win the presidential election this November.

"Americans need a health care package that is within reach of everybody and not just to those with insurance." McCain said at the rally.  "My health care package will be available without you even leaving your house."

The health care package, which would include a box of band aids, medical tape, a tube of disinfectant ointment, a bottle of Tylenol, as well as several pairs of surgical gloves, would be mailed out to recipients in waves based on the last two digits of their social security number.  According to the plan, once supplies in the health care package were depleted, recipients could replenish the package with store bought supplies that could then be stored in the handy, dandy carrying case the health care package would be arrive in.

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